Legacy, Loss, and Living Fully | Sadaf Beynon

Matt Edmundson [0:14 - 1:10]: Welcome to push to be more. My name is Matt Edmundson. I'm gonna be your host for today, and today's podcast is gonna be a little bit different. But before we get into that, let me just say a very warm welcome to you. If this is your first time with us, do like and subscribe. And also, obviously, you can find out more information on the website pushtobemore.com. you can find all the past episodes and all the information there, all the links, all the transcripts, everything are on the website. So pushtobemore.com if you want to find out more about the show, but it's great to see you. Great if you're a regular, thanks for coming back. I am talking to the wonderful Sadaf Beynon, who if you are a regular to the show, you might recognize that name, because normally at the end I go, the wonderful team that makes this show possible includes the. And I usually come up with some kind of descriptive word dynamic. I can't even remember what I say now. I'll just make it up on the spot. But the amazing person.

Sadaf Beynon [1:10 - 1:11]: But they're all true, right?

Matt Edmundson [1:11 - 1:23]: They're all true. The amazing person which is sat upon, who is sat next to me. So I'm going to explain why this is a little bit different and what we have sat off on the podcast in just a few minutes. But before we get into that, should we do the show sponsor?

Sadaf Beynon [1:23 - 1:25]: Yes, we should. You should.

Matt Edmundson [1:26 - 2:01]: I just want you to know Sadaf produces the show, hence the reason why I'm asking what I should actually do. But yes, thank you to today's show sponsor, which is podjunction. Podjunction makes it possible for you to have your own podcast. And if you're a leader or a CEO, I'm convinced personally that podcasting is such a good thing for you to do, hence the reason why we do it. It's just a remarkable networking tool. And if you want to know more about how it all works, obviously you can check out podjunction.com. there is a podcast called Pod Junction, which you and I both do.

Sadaf Beynon [2:01 - 2:01]: That's right.

Matt Edmundson [2:01 - 3:56]: Because Sadaf heads up pod junction. And so you can listen to that. All the tips and tricks are on the podcast. Of course, pod junction has its own services, which we would love to sell you if I'm not being too cheap, but you can find out more at podjunction.com. but yeah, seriously, you don't need any tech experience. You don't need to worry about the whole thing. We'll help you with all of that. But just to get you up and running and get your podcast going. I was saying to somebody the other day, I can't remember who I was talking to. He'll come back to me. I can picture his face as well. But we were talking about podcasting and how he's used it to grow his business from 400 grand a month to 1.2 million. And all he does is he does the strategy, which we talk about. He talks about going, finding your ideal guests, invite them onto your podcast. That's it. You have a great conversation with them. You have a follow up strategy. And Bish Bash Bosch, he's more effective than any salesman. And it's quite extraordinary, actually, the difference it made to his business. And it's the same strategy we use. It's the same strategy we advocate on so many things. Now, don't get me wrong, there are different strategies, different nuances. I get it. So if you want to know more, check out podcast. That will help you every step of the way, especially this wonderful lady here. If you're watching the video, if you listen to the audio, you cannot see me waving. There we go. So today is a little bit different, right? On the push podcast, we are in a different studio, for one, if you're watching the video, not many people watch the video compared to listen. But that's okay. We don't take it personally, but we do the videos as well. But we are in our studio down at the office as opposed to. I'm often in the studio at my home because I normally record the push podcast late at night. That's when most people seem to be able to do them. But you're going to become a push podcast host.

Sadaf Beynon [3:56 - 3:56]: That's right.

Matt Edmundson [3:56 - 3:57]: Did I say that right?

Sadaf Beynon [3:57 - 3:57]: Yep.

Matt Edmundson [3:57 - 4:22]: It just didn't sound right in my head. You are going to be one of the hosts of push to be more. And so we get so many requests to be on the show. It's crazy, actually. And so many people that we want to talk to, again, we use the same strategies. Go find your ideal guest and talk to them on the show, and you have a great conversation. So I am doing five podcasts at the moment, I think. Four or five.

Sadaf Beynon [4:22 - 4:23]: Four or five? Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [4:23 - 4:42]: I can't remember. I lose count. Anyway, most of my time is spent podcasting, so I physically can't do that many more. But Sadif is actually a great podcast host. If you listen to the Pod Junction podcast, then you'll know what I mean. So I wanted to introduce Sadef to you in this show. Say hello.

Sadaf Beynon [4:42 - 4:43]: Hi.

Matt Edmundson [4:44 - 4:54]: The lady behind the camera that makes all the magic happens is now starting to come in front of the camera. And I thought the best way to introduce you to everybody would be for you to be a push to be more guest.

Sadaf Beynon [4:54 - 4:55]: Cool.

Matt Edmundson [4:55 - 5:02]: So we're going to do that. The only thing that I can't do is question box, because I don't have it with me. That's the homestead.

Sadaf Beynon [5:02 - 5:03]: Yeah. Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [5:03 - 5:07]: So I'm gonna get. I'll probably get AI to give me a question.

Sadaf Beynon [5:07 - 5:07]: Okay.

Matt Edmundson [5:07 - 5:24]: But if you had a podcast, let's start with. Well, you do have a podcast, but if you could have anybody on the podcast, past or present, that's had a really big impact on your life, who would it be and why?

Sadaf Beynon [5:25 - 5:26]: It would be my dad.

Matt Edmundson [5:26 - 5:27]: Your dad?

Sadaf Beynon [5:27 - 5:28]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [5:28 - 5:29]: And why your dad?

Sadaf Beynon [5:31 - 5:45]: My dad was just a wonderful man, and he's passed away now, but I have. I have learned so much from him. Growing up, I was very close to him.

Matt Edmundson [5:45 - 5:49]: Yeah. Your dad is girl. Sorry, were you a daddy's girl?

Sadaf Beynon [5:49 - 6:40]: I was. Yeah. I. I was far from the perfect child. I was. There was four of us siblings. I was. For most of my growing up, well, younger years, I was the black sheep family, always getting in trouble for stuff. But my dad, he was just so gracious, so patient, and he had this amazing way of just coming alongside and walking me through things, talking me through things, rather than with the wagging finger. And, I mean, I got in trouble and I had my. I got my consequences, but, yeah. And I just grew really close to that, I think, as a result of that. And he spoke into my life on many levels, and, yeah, it would be him.

Matt Edmundson [6:40 - 6:44]: I'm curious, then, if I can ask this, and no pressure, because we've not planned this at all.

Sadaf Beynon [6:44 - 6:44]: No, we haven't.

Matt Edmundson [6:45 - 7:11]: All very spontaneous. And normally, when a guest comes on the show, we give them a heads up that the only thing we say to a guest is, listen, just so you know, this is the first question we're going to ask you. Right. So. And we didn't have that conversation. So I appreciate. I'll just drop this on you, but I'm curious, what would you want to ask your dad on the podcast that you didn't get a chance to ask him before he passed away?

Sadaf Beynon [7:15 - 7:49]: You know, after he passed away, I had no regrets. I had many opportunities to say everything I wanted to say, to ask everything I wanted to ask. I think since he's passed, I've had. Well, I had two boys that were still very little when he died. And as they're growing up, and as I'm parenting them and wanting to also be that spiritual input into their life. I wish I could ask dad questions about that kind of stuff, or even.

Matt Edmundson [7:49 - 7:51]: To send your kids to your desk.

Sadaf Beynon [7:51 - 7:53]: Yeah. Yeah, that would be.

Matt Edmundson [7:53 - 7:55]: That would be. Yeah, that would be the.

Sadaf Beynon [7:55 - 7:57]: That would be ultimate. Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [7:58 - 9:52]: Fair play. Fair play. It's interesting, actually, having done however many episodes we've done. Now, of course, when I've. Cause it's fair to say we've not asked that question to every guest. It took us a little while to realize this was a great question to ask. And then we did it at the end of the show, and it always felt rushed. So then we moved it to the start of the show. And it always starts a really interesting conversation, I think. But if I. And I've not actually written it down in like, a chart, I can't give you stats. But anecdotally, in my head, I can say the most popular answers to that question. I think the most popular answer is dad. I know Tony Robbins is fairly popular. I know Jesus is fairly popular. But dad tends to be the answer that most people give. And it's usually a case of dad died too young. Right. And there's this section of life where we miss dad. And that input from dad and I. I find it deeply fascinating, the whole father thing, the whole children growing up in fatherless. What's the phrase they use now? Not fatherless, absent fathers, distant fathers. I can't remember what the phrase is, but do you know what I mean? Where dads aren't actively involved in the home. And I think the impact that has on society is quite extraordinary. And the whole thing fascinates me, and so I'm intrigued, you know, the whole thing. I have no findings on this. I have no. What's the word I'm looking for? I have no theory that's come out of this. You know, no research paper. And all I can tell you is there's a lot of people who would like to have spent more time with their dad. And I think that's a really interesting term. Yeah, but your boys are great.

Sadaf Beynon [9:52 - 9:53]: Yeah, I think so.

Matt Edmundson [9:53 - 9:54]: Their dad's great.

Sadaf Beynon [9:54 - 9:55]: Yeah, I think so.

Matt Edmundson [9:55 - 10:00]: He's a cool guy. So, full disclosure, Jeff, your husband comes around my house and watches the football.

Sadaf Beynon [10:00 - 10:02]: Yes, he does. Perfect.

Matt Edmundson [10:02 - 10:04]: And he's actually started bringing Hudson.

Sadaf Beynon [10:04 - 10:05]: Yeah, he has.

Matt Edmundson [10:06 - 10:34]: Who told me he's eleven years old. He told me he couldn't have a beer the other day. We're watching the football. Do you want a drink? He's like, well, I can't have a beer? I wasn't actually offering you a beer. This sounds good because your dad sat. Right, dad? Okay, that was really fast. Very, very funny. So, obviously, the way we do the show, as you have told many people on the podcast, because you've done all the prequel.

Sadaf Beynon [10:34 - 10:35]: That's right. Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [10:35 - 11:39]: And so if you've been a guest on the show, you will recognize her left. You'll recognize her voice. And the prequel. Just so if you're listening, this is basically where we kind of pre check the guests, don't we? We have a conversation with them before just to make sure they're going to be a fit for the podcast and what you do. Ruthless, she calls a lot. No, no, no. I'm just joking. If you're thinking, should I be a guest on the podcast, you'll get on flying with Zedaph. But I'm intrigued, right? We talk about the three pillars, in effect, to the podcast, the three pillars of questions. I'm giving away all the secrets. Now, if you've not figured it out, then I'm really sorry. So I ask questions around three content areas. The push to be and more. Right. Hence the name of the podcast. So where you've had to push through what you do to be, to recharge your batteries and then more, what does growth look like? So, challenge wise, where have you push. What's your answer to that? Where have you. Where have you had to push through? What challenge have you had to face that you've had to come through that you want to share on the podcast?

Sadaf Beynon [11:39 - 11:56]: Yeah. Okay, so you're talking about where I've had a challenge and I pushed through and I'm on the other side. Okay. Wow. Okay. So I know I do the pre calls. I wasn't prepped for this. Quite.

Matt Edmundson [11:57 - 11:58]: You should have done a pre call with yourself.

Sadaf Beynon [11:58 - 12:34]: Yeah, I should have. Okay, I guess I'll just talk about my dad a little bit more. So that was a challenge. He got diagnosed with lung cancer. Actually, it's going to be ten years ago that he died coming up in a few months. And. Yeah. So that was a big shock to the family. And it's challenging.

Matt Edmundson [12:34 - 12:37]: Was it a shock because he was quite a healthy guy?

Sadaf Beynon [12:37 - 14:53]: Yeah. And he never smoked. There was nothing like that in his history. But I think it was just secondhand smoke and just. Well, he was living in Pakistan, too, where it's very polluted and. Yeah. So that was very difficult watching him go through that. It was a very intense time because it was stage four when we figured out that it was in his system. And I was here in England, and my other siblings were spread out around the world, too. My brother was at home with my parents in Pakistan anyway, so, yeah, we all had to kind of make our way there. And while we were making our way there, my mom passed away in a car accident with my elder sister, who had just arrived from Canada. So my mom passed away. My sister was badly injured. There was lots going on. It was a real intense time, actually, for us as a family. And the challenge, I think, was to kind of keep our heads above water while we had young kids to look after and also wanting to be there for the family. But, you know, the Lord was very good to us. He is still very good to us. And he gave us what we needed to get through each day, through each moment, and carried us through it all. And I think all those things that were. That we were able to, like, pull out of ourselves to enable us to get through that time. I think a lot of it comes down to our parents having instilled those values into our lives since we were very little and teaching us about what's important in life, like putting God first, having that relationship with him, growing up with that. So then when trouble strikes, you've got an anchor already. And. Yeah, so I would credit that to them, I think. And, yeah, so it's been a walk, no doubt.

Matt Edmundson [14:53 - 16:23]: But it's fascinating. I mean, in one sense, you've got the. You're flying to Pakistan because you know your dad's dying, right? And you're close to your dad. I'm assuming you were close to mum as well, and close to your parents. Good, close family. The safety of your mum is not in your head. Right? At this point, you're thinking about your dad and going over to him and dealing with the emotion of that, going, actually, he's borrowing a miracle. This man is sort of passing through to the other side, and you have to deal with that. But in the middle of that, you don't get a chance to say goodbye to your mum. And so she was taken in an instant, in an unplanned way, whereas your dad died because of cancer. And as morbid as it sounds, it's kind of. Sharon and I have these conversations on occasions, like, which way is better, right? If you know that you're gonna die, people get to say goodbye. You get to say all the things that you want to say, but there's often pain usually involved in that, whereas if someone dies unexpectedly or instantly, there's no pain, but there's. You're like, hang on a minute. There's all these things that I didn't say or do. How did you deal with that with mum?

Sadaf Beynon [16:23 - 16:53]: Yeah, you're right. It was so unexpected. Really not on our radar at all. I was able to speak with her the night before. She had phoned to ask about something and I was the one to live. She phoned on my phone and I was talking to dad, giving the answers. And then I just said, love you, mom. Good night, see you. And so I kind of felt like I said that much, at least it was a see later, bye kind of thing.

Matt Edmundson [16:54 - 16:55]: It wasn't an argument.

Sadaf Beynon [16:55 - 17:35]: No, there wasn't an argument. It was all good. And, you know, I will see her. I will see her again. I know that. But at the time you just think, like, why? Why does this have to happen? And, yeah, I think there's a lot, like I was saying earlier about being able to talk to daddy again with mom. There's no regrets either, because I was. I think we had very open relationships, so we could. We always just talk quite openly as and when we needed to. So there wasn't anything that was left unsaid.

Matt Edmundson [17:35 - 17:36]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [17:36 - 17:46]: And so that helps. But again, like, all these years later, as you're parenting, you know, especially with mom, it's like, well, how did you do this when we were little? How did you put up with this? What? You know, all these kinds of things.

Matt Edmundson [17:46 - 17:47]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [17:47 - 17:52]: And I would love to be able to pick up the phone to her and to be able to ask her all kinds.

Matt Edmundson [17:52 - 19:08]: No doubt. I would. Without being too jakey, I would actually like to talk to your mom about some of the recipes, because some of the food that you've made passed down by your mum is extraordinary. And I think it is a really interesting one, isn't it? And the lessons I think you can learn from this, because I don't know which way I'm gonna go. Obviously, I can't see into the future. And, you know that I had. I don't have those godlike powers yet. I wish eBay would start selling them. You know, Jeff Bezos on Amazon, you can buy them, but none of us know. But what I do know is at some point, I'm out of here, right. And that could be today. That could be. Hopefully. It isn't. Genuinely, you know, I hope it's not good. There's certain things I still want to do, but living a life in such a way where there's no regrets, maybe no regrets is the wrong phrase, because I think we all have regrets, but living a life in such a way that doesn't take life for granted is maybe a better way to put it. I think it's a hell of a challenge.

Sadaf Beynon [19:08 - 19:09]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [19:09 - 19:34]: Do you know what I mean? In the sense that I want to make sure every time I talk to my kids, I'm not thinking this could be the last time that I talk to them, because that would be very morbid, wouldn't it? Freak the kids out slightly. But at the same time, I don't want anything to be unsaid with them. Same with Sharon, my wife, same with my mum, my dad. Just, you know, you kind of think.

Sadaf Beynon [19:34 - 19:35]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [19:35 - 19:46]: And so I guess what did. Having gone through that, Nick, what have you learned from that that kind of impacts the way you live at the moment?

Sadaf Beynon [19:47 - 20:13]: Yeah. Keeping short accounts, I think, is what I would say to that. And being in the moment, being able to voice things that. That need to be said. And sometimes there are uncomfortable things that need to be said, but it's important to say them. And, of course, with a lot of grace, because sometimes in the moment, you don't want to. You shouldn't just open your mouth. I've learned that, too.

Matt Edmundson [20:16 - 20:17]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [20:17 - 20:37]: But, yeah, I think holding short accounts and I think one of the things with mom and dad in particular, and even with the rest of my family, we're kind of spread out around the world, and so having those opportunities when we talk and saying the things that need to be said is quite. Is quite important for us because we're not always in each other's faces.

Matt Edmundson [20:37 - 20:40]: Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, you've got a sister in Canada, a brother in Australia.

Sadaf Beynon [20:41 - 20:41]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [20:41 - 20:42]: Right.

Sadaf Beynon [20:42 - 20:43]: Two sisters in Canada.

Matt Edmundson [20:43 - 20:43]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [20:44 - 20:44]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [20:44 - 20:46]: Although one of them's coming to the UK.

Sadaf Beynon [20:46 - 20:47]: Yay.

Matt Edmundson [20:48 - 20:50]: Visit for a whole few days.

Sadaf Beynon [20:50 - 20:50]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [20:52 - 20:55]: So you're quite close as a family, but you are spread out.

Sadaf Beynon [20:55 - 20:55]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [20:56 - 21:14]: You collectively are shared in the tragedy of your mom and your dad, and you were all quite close to them. And I remember speaking to your brother on a different podcast about his story and digging into that, which I thought was quite fascinating, just seeing the whole.

Sadaf Beynon [21:14 - 21:16]: Thing from his perspective.

Matt Edmundson [21:16 - 21:28]: From his perspective a little bit, which I thought was quite fascinating. So how do you deal with that as a family? You are close. You are an international family.

Sadaf Beynon [21:28 - 22:52]: Yeah. Yeah. Like you said, it was a shared experience, and so that was actually really helpful and talking about how we were feeling, and. And again, that came quite naturally to us to talk like that with each other. So I think that really helped because you process things a lot more than you're actually realizing. Like, every time you open your mouth to talk about, oh, I had a dream about mom or, you know, I went into this place, I saw this and it reminded me of dads, you know, all of those things, it's all processing. And I think it's important because grief has this, this way of kind of creating a crater in your life and it doesn't actually ever go away. I think people think, oh, just give it time and you'll heal. It doesn't actually go away. I think you adapt, you learn to live with this crater. And then your siblings, or whoever it is that you've had that shared experience with, they're the only ones who can understand really what that looks and feels like. And so it's actually a real blessing to be able to have those opportunities because I think like, even my husband doesn't understand really how it feels. Like he can, how I feel about it, he can get a good idea, but it's never as gonna be as same as how my sister understands it.

Matt Edmundson [22:52 - 23:03]: Yeah, yeah, that's fair enough. So how do you do? You guys talk a lot. Are you like intentional in staying connected or is it.

Sadaf Beynon [23:03 - 23:26]: We try and we try. Now that my brother's moved to Australia, he was living and working in Pakistan for a while. And with the time zones, it's really difficult. So it's either like I'm staying up late or he's staying up late or my other sisters are staying up late. And so we kind of take it in turns, but when we can, and once we get talking, it like goes on.

Matt Edmundson [23:26 - 23:27]: For Anne, she needs to flip, flip flop.

Sadaf Beynon [23:28 - 23:36]: It's like, just hold that, I gotta go make a tea. Just hold that. I gotta take a pee break. It's hard to get off then once you get going.

Matt Edmundson [23:36 - 23:44]: Yeah, fair play. Yes. Well, we should definitely get your sisters onto the podcast. Maybe I could talk to everybody.

Sadaf Beynon [23:45 - 23:45]: Yeah, yeah.

Matt Edmundson [23:45 - 24:39]: Complete picture of the bane on massif, as we like to call it. So the, so given all of that, then you know, and keep short accounts and the way that works, do you see it impacting your style of parenting? Do you see? Maybe a better question here is do you see when you parent your kids, you just stop smiling to yourself because it's like, oh, that's what mum did or that's what dad did. Even when I was, I know when I grew up, my mum, because my parents got divorced when I was young, predominantly living with my mom. And the way she would do things, sometimes I'd find myself, and I'm going to do that with my kids. When I'm older and of course I find myself doing exactly the same thing. So I'm curious, do you see that you do things that just remind you of your mum and dad?

Sadaf Beynon [24:39 - 24:59]: Yeah, yeah, I do. And I think a lot of those values just kind of been instilled in us without us realizing because we were rebelling against it for most of the time, like hating it or just being like, oh, do we have to? But you still do it and then you end up, it just becomes natural to you. So then you like, yeah, it just carries on, doesn't it?

Matt Edmundson [24:59 - 25:01]: Do you see your kids rebelling in the same way?

Sadaf Beynon [25:01 - 25:05]: Oh, yeah, yeah, I do. And I often think like, he's just like me.

Matt Edmundson [25:07 - 25:11]: So do you think to yourself, well, I've sown and reaped there? Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [25:14 - 25:15]: Yeah, yeah.

Matt Edmundson [25:15 - 26:19]: It's one of those things where I've had, I'm very good at kid sometimes with my kids, but I can definitely see it in other people's kids where they act a certain way and their parents are slightly exasperated and I'm like, where do you think they got that from? Because you do the same thing, dude. Or I knew them when they were like my brother and his daughter. And it's like, well, you were like that when you were younger and you're criticizing her for that. And it's like, yeah, but it's different. I'm like, and, but it becomes this ever repeating cycle when I've said to my kids, I said, listen, all those things that you said, I'll never do that. You're going to totally do that. You're going to have these bizarre sort of flashbacks and it's just, it is what it is. It's a part of the circle of life, the lion king. But, yeah, that intrigues me. That intrigues me. So what do you do then? You say you live with this crater. You learn to adapt. What have been some of the ways that you've adapted or how, I guess, what are your coping mechanisms?

Sadaf Beynon [26:19 - 26:32]: Yeah, I don't know if, I don't know what, I don't know what my coping mechanisms are, but I'll tell you what I do. We talk about mum and dad, we talk about things.

Matt Edmundson [26:32 - 26:33]: You find the helpful?

Sadaf Beynon [26:35 - 27:09]: I think so, yeah. I mean, it's just they were, they were a normal part of our life and so we keep them as a normal part of our life and, yeah, we can't, like, pick up the phone to them. But when my kids do funny things or they remind me of something that happened when I was younger, I always tell them, oh, this happened, and mom and dad did this, and sometimes be like, oh, I wish we could meet them, or, you know, there's something. So we keep them alive, we keep their memory alive, and I think that's important. Yeah, I think that is helpful. I think it brings some kind of healing. Yeah, yeah.

Matt Edmundson [27:09 - 29:37]: One of the things that Sharon's grandmother did, she passed away a few years ago. Now, I can't remember exactly how many years, but it was a few years ago she passed away. Real fascinating lady. But as is quite often the way with your grandparents, you don't really know them. Yeah, you know them a little bit, but you don't. Because I think, I mean, I don't really remember my grandparents, other than my single. I only really remember one grandmother growing up because all my other grandparents had passed away either before I was born or very early on into my life. And I remember my grandmother, sweet old lady, who would always drink way too much sherry at Christmas and just be asleep by sort of 02:00. And the one time of the year she goes, I loved you, was when she'd had three sherry. Oh, I love you. You were so lovely. All right, Nan, sit down before you fall over. But when I was growing up, Nan was like, I don't know if you like this, if you had grandparents, but I was like, she is proper ancient, do you know what I mean? Like, mum and dad were old, but my nan, she's like proper ancient. And of course, mine, I'm from a generation where my grandparents were part of the Second World War, right? And they had that sort of commonality. I never took the time, which I regret, while she was alive, to ask her all the stories. And Sharon, what she did a few years ago with her grandfather and grandmother was she sat down and said, right, tell me all the stories. And she made all the notes, and she became fascinated about the lives of her grandparents. And her grandmother actually wrote a book about her life called sought and found, I think. I can't remember what it's called. It's a really fascinating book, just about the story of her life, about what it was like for her growing up in the war and all that sort of stuff. And I think what a wonderful gift. Yeah, it is, because I think, I guess my kids know me, and with the fact that I do these podcasts and that I'm often quite in the public, like, telling them stories, they go, that's that story again, isn't it? And I'll quite often, I remember my dad would say to me when I was younger when I was growing up. This was this. And I go, yeah, I'm not interested. Part of you thinks I'm interested. I wouldn't actually say this, but I.

Sadaf Beynon [29:37 - 29:38]: Just wasn't your head.

Matt Edmundson [29:38 - 30:29]: Do you know what I mean? It's like, I don't care. That was in the sixties. Why would I care about that? I'm in the eighties. What's wrong with you? And so. But now I kind of go, well, actually, I want to know. And so this whole legacy thing, I thought was a wonderful thing that Sharon's grandparents or Sharon's grandmother did was to write this book and to leave this legacy. And I think, I guess my. I don't know why I'm saying all this, but how do you do? You know your mum and dad, you know their stories, but your kids don't. And getting to know them, obviously, they're not interest. I mean, it's not possible, but if they were around, they probably wouldn't be that interested anyway because they're young, but at some point, they become interested. How do you keep that legacy? How do you keep that memory going?

Sadaf Beynon [30:29 - 31:08]: Yeah. So, one, as I said, talking about it with them, the other thing I am working on very slowly is actually writing something down for mom and dad. When dad was very ill and he was coming to the end of his. Of his time, he. I don't know. I didn't mention this, but he was the director of a hospital, and so he. He had a lot of. He was very much in the limelight as well, knew a lot of people and across Pakistan and missionaries, too. And so actually, someone put together this great book where all these people were sending in tributes.

Matt Edmundson [31:08 - 31:08]: Oh, wow.

Sadaf Beynon [31:08 - 31:33]: To him. And so they talked about their, like, how they knew him, their relationship with him, how he spoke into their life, so on and so forth. And someone compiled it all into a folder for us and made copies for all of us siblings. So I have that as a starting point, which is really nice. Yeah. So I want to do something with a bit more background about dad and with mom and I. Yeah. That's happening slowly.

Matt Edmundson [31:33 - 31:36]: Have you taken the kids to the ancestral home?

Sadaf Beynon [31:37 - 31:48]: Yeah, Hudson's been there. Lincoln went when he was like, I don't know, twelve months old. That's when dad was dying, and we haven't been back. And he has no memories, of course.

Matt Edmundson [31:48 - 31:49]: Of course.

Sadaf Beynon [31:49 - 31:49]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [31:49 - 31:52]: But would you take them back?

Sadaf Beynon [31:52 - 32:07]: I don't know. Going back home was always about mom and dad. That was why we went to. So, I don't know. Maybe when they're older and they want to see it for themselves, then, sure. But not now.

Matt Edmundson [32:07 - 32:59]: Right. Fair enough. It's certain. I've never actually been to Pakistan. It's definitely on my list of places to go, mainly because of the food. I'm not going to lie. I'm just going to go and eat. So that's what I'm going to do. And look at the mountains. Like, I. I don't. I know. I can look at the records and I can see the house that my grandparents grew up in is written in the census. Right. Because we have, in Britain, we have these records which tell me where he was at certain points of time. Yeah. I just don't know what it. Do I need to go there? I don't know. It's in Sheffield. It's not exactly far. Do you know what I mean? It's not like an exotic other country. And I can see the house on Google Streets, you know? But it's. It's not like I can just knock on the door, say, do you mind if I come in?

Sadaf Beynon [32:59 - 33:00]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [33:00 - 33:04]: Cause my granddad grew up in this. Do you mind if I look?

Sadaf Beynon [33:04 - 33:05]: What?

Matt Edmundson [33:07 - 33:17]: It just feels a bit odd, didn't it? But the reason I asked, I was just curious. Cause obviously, you grew up in a very different culture to Sheffield.

Sadaf Beynon [33:17 - 33:42]: Yeah. I think, though, I think it is important for the kids to see the culture. I do agree with that, and I think that is important. But I think, selfishly, I don't want to go to Pakistan. I think. Yeah. Like I said before, if they're not there. But I think it is good for them to see. And also not just pakistani culture, just any culture outside of what they're growing up in. I think it helps them to be a bit more well rounded.

Matt Edmundson [33:43 - 33:48]: Because you grew up in Pakistan, moved to Canada.

Sadaf Beynon [33:48 - 33:48]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [33:48 - 34:01]: Hence the accent. International school in Canada. Married a guy in Liverpool Scouser, who's a great guy. But very different cultures.

Sadaf Beynon [34:01 - 34:02]: Very different.

Matt Edmundson [34:02 - 34:36]: So your kids are mixed race. Right. How do you. How do you. Or are you intentionally creating with them, like, that cultural aspect of your life? You know, this is part of who you are. You need to realize this and remember this. That's something I've never had to contend with. My wife's from the south and I'm from the north. Not really the cultural differences on the same scale. But I'm kind of curious how you manage that between you and Jeff.

Sadaf Beynon [34:37 - 34:55]: I think we just. We just do lie. I'm not intentionally trying to put something in front of them. I do teach them various words in Urdu, because then we can talk without other people knowing what we're saying.

Matt Edmundson [34:56 - 35:04]: The kids love that. They do love that language. Even dad doesn't get it. What kind of things do they say?

Sadaf Beynon [35:05 - 35:40]: Well, one of the first things I taught them when they were quite little Washington boogers in their nose. So you can, like, you know, tell them you need to, like, clean your nose without anyone else knowing what you're saying and then getting embarrassed. So that was one of them. And then there's always take your shoes off because that's a rule in our house. So that's. Juty is the word for shoes, so they know that word very well. But, yeah, Jeff, too. He's like, oh, teach me some words, too. So we're all in it together.

Matt Edmundson [35:40 - 35:43]: Yeah. And you're definitely keeping the food culture.

Sadaf Beynon [35:43 - 35:50]: Yes, the food culture and some words where I can. I think it's probably the main thing.

Matt Edmundson [35:50 - 35:50]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [35:50 - 35:51]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [35:51 - 35:51]: Fair play.

Sadaf Beynon [35:51 - 35:53]: That's my heritage right there.

Matt Edmundson [35:53 - 35:56]: Have your kids had to deal with any form of racism?

Sadaf Beynon [35:57 - 36:02]: Um, no, I don't think. Not yet. Not yet.

Matt Edmundson [36:03 - 36:06]: Have you. Have you prepared them for that or have you. Not really.

Sadaf Beynon [36:06 - 36:24]: I haven't really. It's one of those, like, do you draw attention to that or do you leave it? I don't know. Yeah. I mean, you know when they're little and they go to school and they just come back with a whole bunch of paper with drawings on it? Like, that seems to be the only thing they've done at school, but anyway.

Matt Edmundson [36:25 - 36:28]: And if they're teachers are listening, you're a wonderful pimple.

Sadaf Beynon [36:28 - 36:33]: And actually, this is good, actually. So they would come back with drawings of the family.

Matt Edmundson [36:33 - 36:34]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [36:34 - 37:01]: And there would be. I was the obvious one who was, like, colored in brown with black hair and the rest of them, and I said, oh, so who's this? And he's like, well, that's Hudson because he's peach. And that's dad. He's peach. And this is Lincoln. He's peach, and you're brown. Okay. So they obviously see themselves the same as their dads because they're all the same coloring.

Matt Edmundson [37:01 - 37:02]: They're not.

Sadaf Beynon [37:02 - 37:15]: They're not. But that's, like, in the picture, they're all the same, but that's how they see it, right. So they see themselves as just as anyone else around them. They don't see themselves like, they know I'm different. But it's interesting. In their head, they're white.

Matt Edmundson [37:16 - 37:22]: It's interesting. They're more like the boy. Boys tend to be their dads, though, don't they? They want to be more dad, which is good.

Sadaf Beynon [37:22 - 37:23]: Which is good.

Matt Edmundson [37:23 - 37:24]: I was going to say. How do you feel about this?

Sadaf Beynon [37:24 - 37:26]: I love it. I think it should be that way.

Matt Edmundson [37:27 - 37:27]: It doesn't bother you?

Sadaf Beynon [37:27 - 37:37]: No. I mean, they're very. I have a really sweet relationship with both of them and I love what I have, but I think as boys, they should want to be more like their dad.

Matt Edmundson [37:38 - 37:51]: That's really interesting. Yeah, really interesting. I have a really good friend who his dad is, whose dad's passed away. His dad was from Bangladesh and his mum was scottish.

Sadaf Beynon [37:51 - 37:52]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [37:53 - 37:58]: He has never once, as long as I've known him, identified with his scottish heiress.

Sadaf Beynon [37:58 - 37:59]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [37:59 - 38:33]: Or the fact that his mum was white. But he does massively identify with the fact his dad was from Bangladesh and that he is mixed race and that he would. He has a really big heart for the bangladeshi community. He loves the food and German. There's certain aspects of it that he absolutely adores. But it is interesting how he totally went towards the side of his dad and rather than his mum, and I often would say to him, but you're half scottish.

Sadaf Beynon [38:34 - 38:35]: Yeah, I'm not.

Matt Edmundson [38:36 - 38:45]: He's like. And there's no disrespect to our scottish listeners, but for him, it was just a really big thing with his dad and that really fascinated me.

Sadaf Beynon [38:45 - 38:53]: Yeah, they don't like that. They're from, like, if you tell them you're scouts, they don't like that.

Matt Edmundson [38:54 - 38:54]: Okay.

Sadaf Beynon [38:54 - 39:04]: No, they don't like that. They want to. They just find some parts about being scouse weird.

Matt Edmundson [39:04 - 39:04]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [39:04 - 39:08]: Not that they see that in their dad. Yeah, it's not that.

Matt Edmundson [39:08 - 39:09]: It is Scouse.

Sadaf Beynon [39:09 - 39:22]: Who is Scouse? But they don't see that in him. But, yeah, it's just funny. But they'll be like, yeah, but I've got family in Canada, so, you know, and my mom doesn't sound like that, so it's just.

Matt Edmundson [39:22 - 39:24]: Yeah, that's fascinating.

Sadaf Beynon [39:24 - 39:29]: I think they pick and choose what they like and don't. I guess they can do.

Matt Edmundson [39:30 - 39:51]: I like that bit, but I don't like that bit. I like chocolate, I don't like broccoli things. That's exactly what happens. Yeah. Okay, so to be, then, how do you. You've got two kids, you've obviously. I mean, you're living in Liverpool, you're in a. You are kind of dare say an import, you know.

Sadaf Beynon [39:51 - 39:52]: Yeah, you can call me an import.

Matt Edmundson [39:53 - 40:50]: I ask all the question, the question all the time, are you. You know, you're an import. But it's one of those where this is, it's. It's a city you've lived in. It's not the city you grew up in. It's not your culture. You've got Jeff, who is a legend of a guy, a very strong Liverpool fan. And you've got two young kids who are just really good fun. I have to be honest. I love your kids. They're amazing fun. But Lincoln especially is like the Energizer Bunny. That kid could recharge the sun if it ever ran out of power. Just plug him in and it would. So how do you. How do you, in the midst of all of that, you know, the business of work, family life, you are living in a different country to what, you know, how do you recharge? How do you make you better in terms of your own strength? And.

Sadaf Beynon [40:53 - 42:06]: What I don't have is the luxury of time. I tell you that, Gif. So finding times where I can recharge is not easy. And what I'm realizing is that it looks different. It can look different to what it used to be like when I did have the luxury of time. And I think I'm coming to terms with that a lot more because sometimes it actually can just be me and my coffee in the morning, and I can use that time to, even if it's just ten minutes, I need to just maximize what I have rather than thinking, okay, no, I need an hour for just me to just sit and be. But actually, no, ten minutes can be maximized if I can do that. And it's like, I used to love reading and having loads of time to just lie in bed and read, you know, lounge on the couch and read. And that doesn't really happen anymore, but it just looks different now.

Matt Edmundson [42:07 - 43:04]: Yeah, it's interesting in terms of maximizing the ten minutes, because I remember when our kids were little, and you're right, the luxury of time, it just disappears. It does come back. It's the most extraordinary thing. And you do go through these seasons, I find in life and the season of kids, young kids. I always found with my kids that it just got better and better. It was just more and more fun because their personalities developed. And you go from being a parent to being a parent slash mate, which I find a quite fascinating transition. But like you, it's always easy to go. I just need more time. I just need more time. Rather than focusing on what you don't have, focusing on what you do and what you have. Yeah, it's not ideal. So we can all sit there and go, yeah, it's not ideal, but it is what it is. So you like to read?

Sadaf Beynon [43:04 - 43:05]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [43:05 - 43:16]: So if you had, you know, 4 hours just magically to sort of appear, how, what would you do? Do you work out? Do you. Or would you just sit and read? Go to a school?

Sadaf Beynon [43:16 - 43:23]: If I could, I would go for a walk. I'd go. Found some mountain to climb. Yeah. That's what I would.

Matt Edmundson [43:23 - 43:25]: So have you got a big love for the outdoors?

Sadaf Beynon [43:25 - 43:39]: I do. I do. I'm not like a hardcore hiker or anything like that, don't get me wrong. But I would easily just grab a water bottle and some headphones and just go for a walk.

Matt Edmundson [43:39 - 43:40]: Just go for a walk?

Sadaf Beynon [43:40 - 43:47]: Yeah. Yeah. In the mountains, not like around the streets of Liverpool, because that's not relaxing.

Matt Edmundson [43:47 - 43:55]: Kind of take your life into your own hands a little bit. Dodging all the cars that have run the red lights. Although you live near Crox's pot.

Sadaf Beynon [43:55 - 43:56]: I do, yeah.

Matt Edmundson [43:56 - 43:58]: Do you find that's a nice place to go walk around?

Sadaf Beynon [43:59 - 44:00]: No, not really.

Matt Edmundson [44:01 - 44:02]: Don't pull any punches.

Sadaf Beynon [44:03 - 44:03]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [44:05 - 44:19]: I have this route where from my house I can walk into town and there's the quick way, which is a 40 minutes walk. If I just walk down, you know, the main street. The main road.

Sadaf Beynon [44:19 - 44:20]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [44:20 - 44:41]: But if I walk an hour and 40 minutes, I can practically walk through a whole bunch of parks and through some old architecture, you know, some. So you go down through Sefton park, you go through, I don't know if you've ever been down near St. Michael was the old train station. And then you're on the river and then you walk along the river into town.

Sadaf Beynon [44:42 - 44:43]: That's cool.

Matt Edmundson [44:43 - 44:57]: Oh, it's lovely. It's an hour and 45 minutes and so you just can't be in a rush to get to town. But I like you. I kind of, people say to me, are you a beach person or are you a mountain person? I'm like, I'm both. This is why Canada appeals to me.

Sadaf Beynon [44:57 - 44:58]: In so many ways.

Matt Edmundson [44:59 - 45:01]: I could be in the mountain 1 minute and I'm being beach.

Sadaf Beynon [45:01 - 45:02]: Yeah, absolutely.

Matt Edmundson [45:02 - 45:09]: It's that kind of. There is something quite awe inspiring. I love to get up into the lake district.

Sadaf Beynon [45:09 - 45:10]: Yeah. Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [45:10 - 45:31]: And so I've just. This weekend, actually, I've just got it done, got the bed fitted into my van so I can sleep in it finally. But, yeah, the idea, I just, I like to go to the lake district, sit in the lakes, walk in the lakes, work in the lakes. It's just a beautiful part of the world in it. I get how that would recharge your batteries or fill your tank, as Judy Conley would say.

Sadaf Beynon [45:31 - 45:33]: Yeah. Yeah, it does.

Matt Edmundson [45:33 - 45:36]: In a massive way. Where's your favorite playscale walk?

Sadaf Beynon [45:36 - 45:52]: Oh, you know what? We went away to North Wales over the summer, and there was. I can't really say all the names, so I'm not gonna really try. But I think it was called Betsy co ed or something. It's not spelt like that, is it?

Matt Edmundson [45:52 - 45:52]: No, it's not.

Sadaf Beynon [45:52 - 46:07]: That's how we say it. Yeah, that was really nice. And we found some reservoirs that were fun to walk around. It was just beautiful. And, I mean, the sun was shining, so that always helps. But Betsy Coyd seemed like a fun place to go back and explore a bit more as well.

Matt Edmundson [46:07 - 46:13]: You go back with the. I don't know if Jeff would be into this or not, but you can go up there and just do wild camping.

Sadaf Beynon [46:14 - 46:15]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [46:15 - 46:17]: Is that not for me?

Sadaf Beynon [46:17 - 46:17]: No.

Matt Edmundson [46:17 - 46:23]: You need a hotel at the end of your nice walk in the summer. Then this one, I want a hot.

Sadaf Beynon [46:23 - 46:27]: Shower and a proper bathroom.

Matt Edmundson [46:27 - 46:29]: Okay. So we still like our creature comforts.

Sadaf Beynon [46:29 - 46:29]: Yeah. Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [46:29 - 46:33]: Okay, fair play. So what does the future look like? What does growth look like?

Sadaf Beynon [46:35 - 47:16]: Well, as you said, you end up getting more time as the kids get older. And I think that's it. Like, they're growing up all the time, and the transition happens quite quickly, actually. So I think finding what growth looks like, and that changes quite a bit. But I guess where I want to be is I want to have a lot more time. Not that I can, like, you know, hang out in front of Netflix or something like that, but I think I would love to do more things for self improvement. I've always kind of been that way. I want to read. I love reading to learn. I think if I could, I would have always been the eternal student.

Matt Edmundson [47:16 - 47:17]: It is.

Sadaf Beynon [47:17 - 47:49]: So I think that that's fun having, and I think that also helps recharge me if I feel like I'm gaining something or my understanding of something is growing. So I think that would be nice. And I'm also really loving what's happening with plot junction. We were talking about that earlier. Just seeing the growth in that as we're getting clients. Come on. And what that looks like, what the process looks like, and how we're helping them and seeing them get off the ground, I think is really exciting. So more of that.

Matt Edmundson [47:49 - 48:17]: Yeah, it's interesting. You're right. Growth in time will be your big thing. And just finding some, I found, as my kids have got older, obviously the time that I have available has got bigger. And the thing that I just love to do like you is to sit and read and learn and actually write all the things I hated at school.

Sadaf Beynon [48:17 - 48:18]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [48:20 - 48:26]: All the things they made me do at school that I'm just like, well, I just want to be back. So I play, I now find great enjoyment.

Sadaf Beynon [48:27 - 48:27]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [48:27 - 48:29]: Which the irony is not lost on me.

Sadaf Beynon [48:29 - 48:57]: Yeah, yeah, no, I get you. I'm the same. I used to have so many journals, but I find now that I can't. My handwriting isn't the same as it used to be, and my hand gets tired from writing because I could journal for hours. But now I'm like, I need something to type on. But it doesn't seem as personal. Like typing a journal out in, you know, whatever. Whatever platform you want to use, it just doesn't feel personal. So, yeah, that's my dilemma.

Matt Edmundson [48:57 - 49:00]: I found I journal three ways.

Sadaf Beynon [49:00 - 49:00]: Okay.

Matt Edmundson [49:00 - 49:02]: And I've become okay with journaling three ways.

Sadaf Beynon [49:02 - 49:03]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [49:04 - 49:10]: It used to be that I was like, I just handwritten journal, and I do think handwriting, your journal, is just amazing.

Sadaf Beynon [49:10 - 49:11]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [49:11 - 49:35]: And I do like that. But sometimes I don't want to handwrite. I want to type because I can type a lot faster than I can handwrite. And so if there's stuff I just want to get out quickly, then maybe typing is the right thing to do. So then I started typing my journal, and I thought, well, actually, I'm missing my handwritten journal. And then I eventually got to the point where I was going back and forth, and I'm like, it doesn't actually have to be one or the other. It can be both.

Sadaf Beynon [49:36 - 49:37]: Yeah, that's true.

Matt Edmundson [49:37 - 50:13]: And then the third way I've figured out how to journal was during COVID you know, when you. Because it was Covid. We did a lot of walking. I'm just going out for a walk. And I found if I put in my Airpods and opened up the app on the notes recorder app. Yeah, we just open up your notes app. But you could at the time, I mean, they've now got trans. You can now record straight into the voice recorder and transcribe it. But back then. Back then, it was a few years ago, it would transcribe as you go along.

Sadaf Beynon [50:13 - 50:14]: Okay.

Matt Edmundson [50:14 - 50:45]: So you would talk and it would figure out what you were saying. So I would just put the headphones in. I would just walk around the park talking. And the reason I put headphones in was because so people didn't think I was crazy. Just kidding. They obviously thought I was on their phone. I was chatting away, and I'd get quite animated talk. And then everything's just sort of typed up for you. And then you go, right, I'm gonna cut out that bit. Because that doesn't make any kind of sense whatsoever. Because the way you talk is different when you write. And so I found the three different ways quite helpful.

Sadaf Beynon [50:45 - 50:45]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [50:46 - 51:00]: And I never know what mood I'm gonna be in. So I've always got my paper journal and my special journal glasses. Because they have to be a certain strength for me to read what I'm actually. But they're slightly too strong for everything else.

Sadaf Beynon [51:00 - 51:00]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [51:00 - 51:02]: I'm just at that weird age.

Sadaf Beynon [51:02 - 51:21]: But that's interesting what you've said, actually, when you are typing, it's when you're dumping, isn't it? You just need to get something out. Whereas when you're journaling and you're handwriting it, you're processing things a lot more as you're writing. And I think that's helpful for that, isn't it? Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [51:21 - 52:31]: I've always found that you could take anything, any concept, any idea that you're wrestling with or trying to learn. And if you can communicate that in such a way as to teach it, not necessarily because you're an expert, but if you can put down on a piece of paper how you are currently understanding that topic, then that does really good things to your brain. Now, no 1 may ever read it. No. 1 may ever hear what I've got to say about that. But if I had, if I sit there and think, how would I explain this to somebody? Then it helps my brain process in a way which creates deep understanding rather than a surface level. Do you know what I mean? It's that kind of point. And it really helps with emotion as well. I'm feeling really angry. Right. So, hacked off with whoever. Never you, obviously. Never my wife. Let's pick on Keir Starmer. Cause he's the prime minister. I am so hacked off with Keir Starmer right now. And I could write that in my journal, but it didn't really give me any understanding.

Sadaf Beynon [52:31 - 52:32]: Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [52:32 - 52:41]: So to sit there and think, well, how would I explain to this to somebody? It was like, well, I'm hacked off with him because of this is. Oh, now I'm starting to get. Do you see what I mean?

Sadaf Beynon [52:41 - 52:43]: Yeah. And it made me feel this way. Yeah.

Matt Edmundson [52:43 - 54:27]: Yeah. And maybe, actually, if I think it through, he's right about this, but he's definitely wrong about that. And you stop feeling powerless, and you start to understand the reason behind things. But it's not just about emotions. It's like you could take anything. I would sit there. I remember when we almost. You weren't working with us at the time, but when Jersey, the beauty company I had, we almost lost it overnight because the supply decided to. Well, they changed their pricing policy, didn't they? The more you buy, the more you pay. And it almost put us out of business overnight. And I remember one of the things I decided to do was every morning I would go and sit for an hour, and while all this was chaos was going on, I would go sit for an hour and a half in Costa, which was directly under our office. Not because I'm a Costa fan, I just want to point that out, but don't judge me. But it was just easy to go sit in there. And I would write, and I would write, write, and I would write down what's going on, and I'd try and write it in a way to explain it, and then I'd try and write it in a way to explain it. Like, if I was talking to somebody else going through what I'm going through, how would I advise them on what to do? That was such a helpful thing. I ended up turning it into a book, which I've never published, but I gave to the staff to read a at the time. And I thought. And actually, a lot of good feedback on that because it really helped everybody sort of get re envisioned. And we went again, really? But that processing, trying to get deep, trying to understand, and the way it works for me is just trying to explain it to somebody I find super helpful. Super, super helpful.

Sadaf Beynon [54:27 - 54:28]: That's cool.

Matt Edmundson [54:29 - 54:30]: So top tip for me, then.

Sadaf Beynon [54:30 - 54:31]: Yeah, try it.

Matt Edmundson [54:31 - 54:33]: Well, listen, I've thoroughly enjoyed this.

Sadaf Beynon [54:33 - 54:34]: Thank you. It's been fun.

Matt Edmundson [54:34 - 54:39]: I've learned more about you, which I'm definitely going to use for blackmail purposes.

Sadaf Beynon [54:39 - 54:39]: Oh, great.

Matt Edmundson [54:44 - 54:49]: But thank you. Thank you for that. We did literally spring it on you, so well done.

Sadaf Beynon [54:49 - 54:50]: And thank you for the moment.

Matt Edmundson [54:50 - 55:23]: Didn't have a chance to think about anything. But, yeah, if you're listening to the show and you're still with us, thank you for staying with us to the end of the podcast. It's been great to have this conversation. Obviously, make sure you like and subscribe to the show wherever you get your podcast from, because we've got some more great conversations coming up, and obviously, I don't want to miss any of them. And I've realized we've not done the question, you know, like the one that you're in the random question box so why don't you tell folks about show notes and websites?

Sadaf Beynon [55:23 - 55:23]: Okay.

Matt Edmundson [55:23 - 55:26]: And then I'm going to go to AI, and I'm going to find a question.

Sadaf Beynon [55:27 - 55:52]: All right. So to get the show notes from this episode, you just need to head over to pushtobemore.com, and you can get access to everything there, plus links to the video, the audio, anything you need. And of course, if there's anything you want to reach out to us about, you can do that from the website as well. What was elf? What else was there to say?

Matt Edmundson [55:52 - 55:56]: You're the producer, and I.

Sadaf Beynon [55:59 - 56:11]: Yeah, we would love your feedback. I don't know if you say this or not, Matt, but, yeah, we would love to know what you guys think of the show, and if there's anything that you think we could do differently, we'd love to hear your input.

Matt Edmundson [56:12 - 56:21]: Yeah, absolutely. It's coming up with some questions, so I'll scan through them. So. Okay, just give me an. I've asked for ten. Give me a number between one and ten.

Sadaf Beynon [56:21 - 56:22]: Eight.

Matt Edmundson [56:22 - 56:32]: Eight. What's a question you think people in your field should be asking more often but rarely do?

Sadaf Beynon [56:35 - 56:36]: What? Say that again.

Matt Edmundson [56:37 - 56:44]: What's a question you think people in your field should be asking more often but rarely do?

Sadaf Beynon [56:45 - 57:08]: Okay, so podcasting. And the question that people should be asking more of. Is anyone listening? I'm kidding.

Matt Edmundson [57:09 - 57:10]: If anyone listening?

Sadaf Beynon [57:11 - 57:12]: No, I'm kidding.

Matt Edmundson [57:12 - 57:13]: Is anyone out there?

Sadaf Beynon [57:13 - 57:25]: Is anyone out there? And this is hard, actually, because doing what we do, we're asking these questions all the time, aren't we? So I'm hoping there isn't one that I'm leaving out.

Matt Edmundson [57:26 - 57:33]: No. But I guess what do you see other people, when you look at other people, what do you see that they're not asking? That they probably see.

Sadaf Beynon [57:33 - 57:41]: Right, okay. Could I market my business differently than the usual.

Matt Edmundson [57:41 - 57:42]: Yeah.

Sadaf Beynon [57:43 - 57:51]: Modes of marketing? So I guess the question I want to hear is, can I use podcasting to market my.

Matt Edmundson [57:52 - 58:47]: It's a good time to grow my business. Today's show sponsor, by the way. But I think it's an interesting question, isn't it? Because you do see people. I think maybe it's an age thing. As you get older, you start to develop axioms, you start to develop little principles that you live by. And in your field is an interesting question. What's the one question that people should ask but rarely do? Because I would genuinely. My response to that question would actually be just to ask questions, because I don't think people do. People make statements, and I think in the advent of social media and the polarization of society right now and the parties own ship and all that sort of stuff. People are very good at making statements, but very, very bad at asking questions. And so we don't have the understanding that we need. We have the opinions that we think we should have.

Sadaf Beynon [58:47 - 58:48]: Good point.

Matt Edmundson [58:49 - 59:17]: And I heard a very, I don't know where I heard it from. I don't even know who I'd credit it. But, you know, opinions are like assholes, aren't they? Everyone's got one. And son, you're like, yeah, I just think broad, macro, people have lost the art of asking questions. It seems to me to be we have moved from questions to statements, and if people don't hear us, we make the statement louder. It's a bit like, you know, shouting.

Sadaf Beynon [59:17 - 59:18]: For the person in the back.

Matt Edmundson [59:19 - 1:00:47]: It's a bit like the english guy traveling somewhere and going somewhere foreign and they don't speak English. They do speak English, and they go, no. So you start to shout, like, that's going to make it easier. But it's one of those where we just have stopped asking questions. And I think as a site generally, it's got a bit deep this, hasn't it? But if I was to think about it more micro and I focus in, say, on podcasting, what's a question that people should have but rarely should ask, but rarely do? I would say, yeah, something along the lines of, like what you said, an important question to ask would be, what is the best way to market my business? And it's not the silver bullet, right? In my opinion. And I think it's got to be around old school principles like telling stories, forming relationships, just being with people. Heaven forbidden. You know, no one these days calls anybody. Everyone texts. Heaven forbid I call someone. But yeah, I'd say the same thing as you. Something along the lines of how do I market my business better? Where I'm not trying to do it the same as everybody else. I'm doing it in a way that makes sense for me, that works for me, that works for my clients, connects with my clients and my ideal clients.

Sadaf Beynon [1:00:48 - 1:00:56]: Yeah. And actually tying that back to what you said earlier, a lot of people just do what everyone else is doing because they're not asking the question. Right? Yeah, yeah.

Matt Edmundson [1:00:56 - 1:01:11]: Just following along. And I think actually just asking simple questions. Just ask a question, you know, the top of a piece of paper, back to your journal, write down the answer and see where it takes you. Yeah, powerful times. So thank you for coming onto the show.

Sadaf Beynon [1:01:11 - 1:01:12]: Thank you for having me, Matt.

Matt Edmundson [1:01:12 - 1:01:22]: It's been great. It's been great. Of course, if you'd like the notes, how do people reach you? How do they connect with you if they want to do that? I should ask this question. I've not got my usual notes with me, so I'm a little bit lost.

Sadaf Beynon [1:01:23 - 1:01:37]: How to connect with me. Well, you could go to the website pushtomemore.com and send an email from there, just on the contact page, and that will come to me. Or you can find me on LinkedIn and I can add that to the.

Matt Edmundson [1:01:37 - 1:01:45]: Show notes, but add that to the show, it's gonna be weird. You editing and producing your own podcast. Are you one of these people that really doesn't like the sound of their own voice?

Sadaf Beynon [1:01:45 - 1:01:51]: You know, I was that person, but now I've just. I still don't like it, but I've just learned to block it out.

Matt Edmundson [1:01:53 - 1:02:39]: You do this so many times, just like I was. It doesn't mean. But no, it's fascinating. Thank you. And now obviously all the links sat off will be in the show notes. Do reach out. Do say, how's it? And check out the website pushbemore.com. but that's it from us. If no one's told you yet today, obviously, you are awesome. Yes, you are kraalian awesome. It's just a burden you have to bear. Sarah F. Has to bury it. I have to bear it. You have to bear it as well. Doing that thing with my hands again. You have to watch the video. Yes. This show is produced by this person right here. Also. I say the wonderful team that makes this show possible is possible is the pod junction team, which is Sadef headset and all the other wonderful people around. So thank you so much for joining us. We'll see you next time. Bye for now.