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If It’s Not All Right, It’s Not The End | Kelly Tucker

Today’s Guest Kelly Tucker

Let's talk about Kelly, the charismatic founder and managing director of HR Star, who brought it to life in 2015 after two decades honing her skills in HR. With a stellar track record, she's transformed everything from budding start-ups to established corporations with her unique, people-centric approach. Kelly firmly believes that HR magic happens when employees are engaged, happy, and motivated, turning workplaces into productivity powerhouses where values shine, profits soar, and success is simply human.

Ever overpacked for a trip or struggled to voice your expectations? Dive into a candid conversation between Kelly and Matt, unraveling the universal quirks and challenges we all secretly share

In today's episode we explore:

  • Kelly underscores the value of understanding and effectively communicating expectations in diverse contexts or relationships.
  • Kelly champions being open and transparent in all forms of communication, a principle applicable in various scenarios.
  • Kelly highlights how pivotal it is for individuals to feel a sense of belonging and significance in any group or setting.
  • People naturally gravitate towards environments where they feel they are a part of something bigger and where their contributions are recognized and appreciated.
  • Throughout their interaction, both Kelly and Matt delve into topics that resonate deeply, illustrating the universality of certain human experiences and perspectives.

Links for Kelly

Sponsor for this episode

At Aurion Media, we're committed to helping you set up and run your own successful podcast to grow your business and impact.

"You know what? I have found running my own podcast to be really rewarding. It opens doors to amazing people like nothing else I have seen. I have built networks, made friends, and had a platform to champion my customers, my team and my suppliers. I think just about any entrepreneur, or business leader should have a podcast because it has had a huge impact on my own businesses." - Matt Edmundson.

Is Podcasting Right For Your Business?

This is a great question and one we think you should really think about. Podcasting is proving to be a great tool to open doors to dream clients, network and build phenomenal customer relationships. But we know that podcasting might not be right for everyone. That's why we have put together a free online workshop to help you decide if Podcasting is right for you and your business as well as to understand what is involved for you.

Is Podcasting hard?

It certainly doesn't have to be. The technology has got easier and cheaper, so the trick is making sure your strategy is right from the start. Most podcasts end because it was started on a whim or even a good that just wasn't thought through or planned. Once you've got that in place, it's then about the right guests and consistency which all comes down to the team that you have around you that can help with this. No worries if you don't have a team...Aurion has a series of done-for-you services that can help you get the right strategy and bring the consistency you need to have real impact on your business.

Want to know more?

Visit our website for more info. We'd love to help!

Kelly: [00:00:00] It was my decision to start it. I wanted it. I wanted it to be successful. That's one thing about me, I'm very driven, like, I don't like to fail, I don't, if I set my mind on something, I like to achieve it, so it's like, I will do this, and I will, you know, also be a mum to three young kids, you know, I won't be the first person to do this, I won't be the last, there's probably women out there who work far more hours than I do, with more kids, etc, so, um, yeah, I was just in it, and I was just doing it, and now, on reflection, now, because life is, It's been easier with older children.

We're doing different challenges, of course. And my eldest is nearly 15, so we have the teenage, you know, years. Um, yes, but now I've got a successful business that enables me to have flexibility and, you know, on nice holidays, et cetera, et cetera. So it was tough though, like I'm not going to, you know, downplay that.

It was really tough doing three young children and starting a business.

Matt: Welcome to Push To [00:01:00] Be More with me, your host, Matt Edmundson. Now this is a show that talks about the stuff that makes life work. And to help us do just that, today I am chatting with Kelly Tucker from HR Star about where she has had to push through, what she does to recharge her batteries and to be, well...

Well, there's what more looks like. How are we going to grow? What does the future look like? Now, the show notes and transcript from our conversation will be available on our website, pushtobemore. com. And whilst you're there, you can also sign up for our newsletter, because each week we will email you the links along with the notes from the show automatically.

inbox. Totally for free, which is amazing. So make sure you sign up. Now, this episode is brought to you by Aurion Media, which helps entrepreneurs and business leaders set up and run their own successful podcast. Why on earth would you want to do that, you may well ask yourself. Well, it [00:02:00] is a great marketing tool.

Perhaps, if I'm honest with you, one of the best. Marketing tools currently available on the market, uh, on the market. At least from my experience, I've found running my own podcast to be really rewarding. It opens doors to amazing people like nothing else I have seen. I've built networks, made friends, and had a platform to champion my customers.

My team and my suppliers. And I think just about every entrepreneur or business leader should really think about hosting their own podcast just because of the impact it has had on my own business, which of course sounds great in theory, but there's a whole lot of questions that this then throws up.

What's the right strategy? What's the right tech? How do I even know? What I'm doing makes any kind of sense whatsoever. I get you. And this is where Aurion Media comes in. They take all of that off your plate and you just get to talk to people, uh, and they get to do all the other stuff, which is amazing because frankly, [00:03:00] that's what I want.

I definitely don't want to do production, all that sort of stuff. Uh, so I get to do what I'm good at and they brilliantly take care of the rest. So if you're wondering if podcasting is a good marketing strategy for your business, which I Strongly say it is. Check out aurionmedia. com. That's A U R I O N media.

com. A U R I O N aurionmedia. com. And we of course have a link to them on the podcast website, pushtobemore. com as well. Now. That's the show sponsor. Let's talk about Kelly, the charismatic founder and managing director of HR Star, who brought it to life back in 2015 after two decades honing her skills in this whole complex field.

And with a stellar track record, she's transformed everything from brilliant startups to established corporations with her unique people centric approach. Now, Kelly firmly believes that HR magic happens. When [00:04:00] employees are engaged, happy and motivated, turning workplaces into productivity powerhouses. Oh yes, which is not easy to say, but it's a good outcome to get, right?

So Kelly, it is great to have you on the show. Thank you for joining me. How are we doing today?

Kelly: Hey, Matt. It's really great to be on. Good. Thank you. Very good today.

Matt: Yeah, enjoying the hot crazy weather we've been having in England recently.

Kelly: I am a massive fan of the hot, crazy weather. Yes. So, uh, more sunshine, the better for me.

Matt: You see, I'm with you. I'm genuinely with you. I love, love, love the heat. I know it's not for everybody and I do feel for the hay fever sufferers amongst them. But we don't often get these sort of heat waves, do we? But it's nice to, nice to, nice to ride the wave when we have it. So, welcome to the show. Let me start, Kelly, by asking you the question I love to ask everybody at the start of the show. As this show is [00:05:00] sponsored by Aurion Media, the podcast agency, um, I'm curious if you did have your own podcast and you could interview anybody, right, from your past or from the present indeed, that's had a big impact on your life, who would be your guest and why?

Kelly: Okay. So I've got two,

Matt: Okay?

Kelly: the question, but I do have two, one personal, one professional. So in terms of from a professional, as in who's, I suppose I've listened to and just Uh, Food for Thought. From a working, you know, my career point of view would be Stephen Bartlett. He's a person I, I discovered, sort of discovered podcasts through, shall we say.

So I started listening to Diary of a CEO years and years ago, probably when it was in its infancy. So when it just used to be Stephen talking, um, you know, to, to, to himself or to his, to his audience. [00:06:00] And sharing, um, his story about how he basically started with nothing and became, you know, a really young, um, multimillionaire and started a business, et cetera.

So I really enjoyed that story, but what I love more now about the Diary of a CEO is the guests. So listening to, to other people's stories and, and, you know, of ones I can sort of recall that I've really found interesting. Davina McCall, just hearing her story and her struggle with addiction, et cetera. Um, Gary Neville, really interesting.

So more so I like listening to, I suppose, the Diocese now because of the types of guests he has on and just listening. You know, different people's stories. I think it's so easy to, to, when you see entrepreneurs out there or business owners or brands who are doing really well to think, Oh, they obviously just became an overnight success and nobody's an overnight success.

So hearing actually real life stories of how people have gone through the struggle or the challenges, it's really refreshing and you know, they share tips, et cetera. So as an entrepreneur, business person myself, it's great to hear from as many entrepreneurs as [00:07:00] possible.

Matt: So that's the professional one.

Kelly: Hmm.

Matt: What was the other one? Um,

Kelly: So the personal would be my dad. Um, I recently lost my dad to an illness called Lewy Body, um, Dementia. So it's a form of, um, Dementia with Parkinson's. Something that, um, when my dad got diagnosed with it, probably about... 5 years ago, everyone, anyone who knew of the disease would say to me, I'm so sorry to hear that and really pull the face, Oh God, I'm so sorry.

And I don't, I didn't know enough about the disease to understand. I don't think the impact it was going to have. So. Then, just seeing that deterioration over the years and then finally, you know, him pass away, um, four or five weeks ago, I think, thank you, I think it was only then when we were preparing for the funeral and going back through all the photos and looking at the memories of my dad, it reminded me of what my dad was before he got poorly, so we could go [00:08:00] back to the past and have a conversation with my dad before The disease really took hold of him to, you know, to have those types of conversations, just ask him, you know, what was his favorite memories?

What, you know, what did, what do you enjoy about life, et cetera. And, and just have that one last chat with him where he, he was him and he fully understood who he was and what was happening. You never know sometimes when something's the last time and it would be nice in hindsight, or just now to go back in time to have that conversation.

Or he was too poorly.

Matt: Yeah, no, fair enough. And I, um, so one, sorry to hear about your loss and, uh, it's never great. And, um, it's interesting how many people come on the show and ask him that question. And a lot of people say they're dads. Uh, I, I don't know if dad is the most popular answer. Uh, I, I guess it must be, I think it's the most common answer, um, that people say.

There's like, oh, there are things that I wish that I would have asked him.

Um, and it's interesting, isn't it? [00:09:00] I, And I sit and I listen to everybody think, I must ask my dad those questions, you know, I must learn from this, um, I still haven't, I've still not had him on, maybe I should have him on the podcast, Dad, come on the show, um, and, and, and start asking him some of these questions.

Cause I think it would, I think you're right. I think it's sometimes you just, you don't know when, when the last time is, do you? Uh, and this is what they say with, with things like that, um, I've just been visiting, uh, some friends in the States and he has Parkinson's, um, and he's a very different man to what he was 12 months ago when I went over, um, and you, you, you do, you do wonder, don't you, how much of that has...

How much he is aware of what's going on and all that sort of stuff. So, well, so you've got your dad, you've got Steve Bartlett, who's the diary of the CEO guy, who's also, is he on Dragon's Den now?

Kelly: Dan as well now, yeah.

Matt: And do you watch that?

Kelly: I do, but I'd always watch Dragon's Den, so it was something that I'd watched previous to him joining. Um, [00:10:00] so, yeah, and I still watch it now he's on it, but I like Peter Jones.

Matt: Fair enough. I have to be honest, I've not seen Dragon's Den for a while, mainly because I get really annoyed with people that go on. I don't know why, I'm just like, I find it really frustrating.

Kelly: Do you know their numbers? And you know the one thing the dragons are gonna ask you when you're pitching are your numbers. So, what was your turnover from that, what was profit, etc. And when they can't answer those questions, like, that's the one question you know that you're gonna get asked.

Matt: Yeah, yeah, it's crazy, isn't it? You're just like, oh, oh, I just really struggle. I'm a bit like, I have some paramedic friends and they can't watch medic dramas with me because the way it's portrayed on TV, you go, it's not like that. And I'm going, it's not like this. I'm like the equivalent with, with Dragon's Den.

So if you, so you're a fan of Dragon's Den, which I think in the States is called Shark Tank. I think, I could be wrong. But this is a basic premise of a TV show where there are four or five people now who are quite successful. Entrepreneur Steve [00:11:00] Bartlett would be one of them, um, and you go in with your business idea.

You've got a few seconds to pitch your business idea and they're going to decide whether or not they are going to invest in your business. That's the general premise of the show. It's been going on for a few years now. So, Kelly, what would you pitch the Dragons?

Kelly: Oh, see, this is a trick because I do, I often think about this when I'm watching it and obviously watching these business, um, owners pitch and the startups, et cetera. And, and a lot of it is product based. So they're pitching products rather than a service. And obviously what I do is, is service based. So I don't know how I would necessarily like pitch to the dragons, but if I was pitching HR Star, then I, you know, I do it from an angle that it's.

It's more than just traditional HR, so we'll probably get into this, but the reason I set up HRstyle was to do HR differently, and everyone says that, and we're different, but [00:12:00] in that whole, but HR was, you know, is, I suppose, historically, and even when I was up until I left being employed in HR. A function you wheel out to hire and fire, or there's a problem in the workplace, get HR in, and the rest of the time you kind of put them back in, back in the box, as it were.

And I, you know, very much believe that if you took a more proactive approach to how you look after your people, you will see business success through retaining and having engaged, motivated people. So, I suppose that's my pitch. I do HR differently. Because it's about focusing on the positive and take, you know, remember there's a human in the process and doing things to keep them engaged and motivated so that they perform really well for you and they don't go sick and they don't leave and, and, you know, they don't have poor performance issues.

So yeah, that's kind of in a nutshell, it's doing HR differently.

Matt: So why, what was it? I mean, I, I, you briefly touched on this. Maybe we can dig into a [00:13:00] little bit further. Why did you feel the need with HRSTAR to do things differently? What, what was, what was it that you didn't either didn't enjoy or, or there was missing that you thought I really need to make a big difference here?

Kelly: So I think it first started when I had my first HR job. So when I fell into HR, um, I needed a job. I took a redundancy to do some travel when I was, um, 21. Um, and then got back and was living with my parents and my dad was just basically on my case about, you need, Kelly really needs to go get a job now.

And I was like, hmm, come on. So anyway, I, so I'll show willing. So, um. contacted some, um, recruitment agencies about, and they, for any temp work, and they had a temp admin role within a HR department for, um, a large charity near where I lived. I was like, okay, I can do that for, you know, for a little bit. That will keep my dad happy, and a little bit of money, beer tokens.

Um, [00:14:00] so I did that, and I initially went there for six months, and ended up staying there for eight years. And, and through my time working there, Um, I was there for, I'd say, for eight years and I worked my way up to HR Manager and, and they're a charity and during that eight years I worked there, I saw things that made me sort of question why they were spending their money and time in the way they were.

For instance, spending around 80 to 90,000, a year on recruitment fees, so advertising, So to hire, um, back then it was only to place adverts in the paper, um, just to replace people who were leaving. And I was thinking, surely if you just took some of this money that you're spending and invested it in training or salary reviews, these people wouldn't be leaving.

And so there was that. Then when there were... Um, issues that were poorly managed with staff, they would, higher level staff, instead of managing it properly, they would [00:15:00] settle with people and pay them like huge amounts of money to leave. And it was then I was thinking, you know, you're a charity, money's really important to you, but you don't, you're never focusing on the people or the right thing about the people.

It's about sort of fixing the problem. Um, or just throwing money at recruitment rather than looking to, um, to, to understand the why, why people are leaving. So I left there, um, and then when I went to work, um, at another business, I went there for initial six months to set up a HR department and stayed there for eight years.

It, it was similar. I was working as a HR business partner there, so I had a strategic role, but then I was only invited into certain parts of the discussion at at, you know, board level, and discussions that would impact the people, restructures, office moves, changing working hours. And I would get wheeled in after these discussions have been sort of had, and a decision was made.

I was like, I should be here earlier in this discussion, because I'm closer to the people I understand, and why these things should be [00:16:00] executed, or just the way they'd want to execute it for me. People focused approach. Um, and so yeah, it's just like, and then when I did my CIPD qualification, you do a management research report, so like a dissertation, if you're doing a degree.

And I did it into the impact of the psychological contract in the workplace. I really started looking and basically employee engagement then about if you put the effort into creating safe working environments where people feel. That they're valued, that, you know, that they're rewarded for the effort that they, that they make, that they, um, have transparency over communication, they have a voice.

That all of these things build this strong psychological contract, which then people are more motivated, are going to perform better, less likely to leave, etc. So all of those things together just made me think, I want, I want to do something different. I had started advising people I know, knew at the time, friends, family, friends, et cetera, from a HR point of view and liked that, liked having the variety of working in [00:17:00] different businesses.

So where I was employed at the time as a HRBP, they contact, they approached me and said, look, we know you want to do your own thing. We don't want to lose you. So how about we've support you in setting up your, as a consultant, we'll be your first client. Well, you can work from our office. Um, and yeah, the rest, as I say, is history.

So they were my first client. I gained a couple of clients very quickly after that. And then HR Star grew from there.

Matt: Well. Well, it's fascinating. And I mean, it's, I'm sitting here listening to the story and I'm thinking about that company that said, Oh, we don't want to lose you. Let's help. We'll help you start out. That's quite an unusual thing for a company to do, right? And so, um, are you still in touch with them? Are they still friends?

Kelly: Yeah, still friends, not working together anymore, just because they, so they were, um, a company. So the directors of that company were setting up a couple of other businesses because they didn't have any shares in the company that they were running. So then they eventually over the years. It's hard ways that company [00:18:00] concentrate on their thing and I did the same, but all very amicable.

Um, but yeah, it was, yeah, I, I was fortunate that they approached me and recognized that if, you know, I was going to leave, but they didn't want me to. So I had the best of both worlds in that respect. And I had their support in the first 12 months, you know, with setting up a business to, you know, bounce ideas off of just, you know, ask for advice from, et cetera.

So yeah, it was, it was, it was a good, you know, um, foot in the door, step up the ladder. But yeah,

Matt: yeah, no kidding, and the fact you could call them up and ask advice, all super helpful, um, super, super helpful. I love that actually, I love that when businesses, um, recognise that maybe the best thing to do for some of their staff is to not actually try and control them 24 7, but, you know, to let them loose a little bit and help facilitate that, um, that's really cool.

So, HR Star is born, what year was it, did we say, sorry?

Kelly: 2015. Well, it would have been [00:19:00] 2014, however, um, just as I was about to launch, I found out I was pregnant with my third son,

Matt: Oh, wow.

Kelly: was not a planned, a planned addition to the family. A welcome surprise, we tell him. Um, yeah, so that sort of made, um, the start, that pushed the start date back on that. So I carried on being employed then with the, um, the HRBP role that I was doing.

Again, they were really supportive, started doing some set up of HRSTAR in the background, went off, had my third son, took four or five months off. And then when I came back, I launched, um, yeah, I launched HRSTAR, so 2015 officially.

Matt: So, what was it like launching, uh, your business, uh, with a brand new third child, the, the Happy Accident, what did you call him, the Welcome Surprise?

Kelly: Yeah, yeah, the welcome surprised. Um, it was full on, and I don't, I think it's like most, well, for me, with things, when you're in [00:20:00] something, you just, I go through the motions, I'm in it, I'm doing it, so, you know, fair enough, and I think it's only then when you come out the other side and I look back and I think, God, that was full on.

I had one child at primary school, one at preschool, and a newborn, so that's just three different, you know,

Matt: Mm hmm. Mm hmm.

Kelly: With those three, um, a husband, a house to run and then setting up a business. So I used to work seeing clients all day, finish that I could come home in time to see the children and be there for bath, bedtime, et cetera.

And then do all my admin in the evenings. Um, so yeah, it was full on, but I loved what I was doing from a work point of view. Um, and in, and sometimes I find that easier than being a mum because of how full on that was. Um, but I also knew it wasn't going to be forever. Like, I knew that I had to put the effort in to grow the business.

It was my decision to start it. I wanted it. I wanted it to be successful. That's one thing about me, I'm very [00:21:00] driven, like, I don't like to fail, I don't, if I set my mind on something, I like to achieve it, so it's like, I will do this, and I will, you know, also be a mum to three young kids, you know, I won't be the first person to do this, I won't be the last, there's probably women out there who work far more hours than I do, with more kids, etc, so, um, yeah, I was just in it, and I was just doing it, and now, on reflection, now, because life is, It's been easier with older children.

We're doing different challenges, of course. And my eldest is nearly 15, so we have the teenage, you know, years. Um, yes, but now I've got a successful business that enables me to have flexibility and, you know, on nice holidays, et cetera, et cetera. So it was tough though, like I'm not going to, you know, downplay that.

It was really tough doing three young children and starting a business.

Matt: Yeah, I bet it was, and I'm kind of curious, Kelly, if I can pry a little bit. What was the conversation like with your husband when [00:22:00] you're like, oh, we're going to have a new child and I want to start a business, but, uh, what was that like?

Kelly: Um, he's supportive. So he would always be, yeah, okay, yeah, you do what you need to do. We'll make it work. So then I sort of dropped the bombshell because we were using a childminder preschool. So I was like, we need a nanny. He's like, what? I was like, we need a nanny. Like, we've got a nanny. Three kids in three different places.

We need somebody at home to help with the house. These are kind of, it's very pretentious. It's all very like, we're not the people, we're not the kind of people having a nanny. I was like, well, we need a nanny. So I went to him with like a proposal. Like this is how much it would cost if we carry on doing what we do with childcare.

Then we'll have cover in the evenings and this summer, if we get a nanny. So yeah, we got a nanny. Um, so from that point of view, it was fine between my husband and I in terms of that was covered, you know, the kids, who was where and doing what, but I think it was more so what he struggled with was at times he could see I was I was choosing [00:23:00] HR star over the family.

It was like, well, you're putting so much effort into this business. I don't, I don't feel the same effort is going into the kids. But for me, that was covered off because the nanny was like covering that off during the day and was there evenings and weekends. Okay. Was working late, you know, a lot of evenings, et cetera.

So again, I'm not going to like, you know, Paint this picture that it was all, you know, sunshine and flowers and butterflies. It certainly was, and it was tough, and there was some tough conversations with, between me and my husband at times, where I had to be like, I've got to right now prioritize him and the kids before work and kind of, you know, make some different choices.

So yeah, tough, tough times. And, and still, I suppose we have that conversation to a degree because I'm a, I'm driven. I'm also really bad at living in the present. I'm always thinking about the next thing, the next thing. And he's like, can't you just stop and appreciate how far you've come or appreciate what you've got for now or the wins, like take a breath.

Whereas I'm like, nope, got to crack on, [00:24:00] crack on. And um, so there's those conversations we'll sometimes have when he's just like, you know, we, at some point, we have to like, enjoy the fact that we still do have young children. We're still young. So, and to be fair, I think what happened recently, we're obviously losing my dad has, has...

That's, you know, people telling me certain things. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. But sometimes you've gotta appreciate something or go through something to appreciate it. So I had a really full diary. Work was crazy busy. Um, April, last week of April, we got the call to say my dad had put on, been put on end of life care.

And I actually just ring, um, my PA and say, okay, you're gonna have to clear my diary for the week. Now. Any other reason, I never would've cleared my diary or juggle stuff, would've made it work to go and be with my dad and then. I thought, right, my dad had passed, I thought I'd be okay, you know, he'd been poorly.

I can just go back to work. And I couldn't, like, I just lost, I'd lost my mojo, I'd lost my motivation. And I don't even know if it was, it was obviously because my dad had died, but it wasn't like I was [00:25:00] sat around feeling sad about the fact that my dad, I just, I had, I just thought, I just can't, I just don't want to do this anymore, I don't want to, I don't want to do anything, I just wanted to sit on the sofa and watch This Is Us.

Um, so,

Matt: Yeah.

Kelly: yeah, yeah, wow, that, it was that bad. Um, so, um, and then, um, It was coming up to half term, the week after the funeral, and last minute I booked a holiday for, for, for Rafe, my husband, and our three boys to go away. We went to Sharm in Egypt, and I was like, I just need to get away from my family, because we'd all been supporting each other, but spending a lot of time with each other.

You know, I needed to change the scenery, and I needed some sunshine. And I, you know, I took that week, and we literally just went away. Relaxed the whole week, had a real nice time with the kids, and then I came back fully, fully recharged and ready to like, and then since I've been back the last two weeks, just been back on it at work, really motivated.

So I think I. Until recently, appreciated that sometimes you [00:26:00] do need to stop. He's right. My husband was like, do you need to take a break? I do need a rest. So I have to make sure that, you know, I am doing that more often because, and also because you don't know, you know, my dad was such an active man and was really young.

age and fit and healthy and then obviously he got this disease and then within five years he's no longer with us so you don't know obviously how much time you've got so i think it is about appreciating more so the time when you know that you are here

Matt: Mm. Yeah. It's about that. Well, it's doing that thing which you struggle with, which is to be present with the people that you're with, isn't it? I was reading this really interesting stat the other day, um, for reasons I won't bore you with Kelly, but this, this stat stood out to me. I was, it was a research project that was done in Australia. And I was really intrigued by the impact of doing mealtimes as family together, right? So, uh, I've been married 25 years this year. My wife is still the most amazing person on the planet. She's put up with [00:27:00] me and my crazy ways for however long. And one of the things that we've done, because people always say to you, you know, have you, have you, have you managed to make it this far? And so one of the things that I've gone back with and said is, well, we always have always done is family meal time, right? 6pm we all try and eat together. And I, so I was like, well, does this actually make a difference? Do you know what I mean? And I, I went away and we looked at this project and it turns out that, um, statistically speaking, you are 30% less likely to have a divorce if you do family mealtimes together and one other thing, because if you just do family mealtimes together, like in front of the TV or with phones around the table, it has no impact.

There's no difference whatsoever. But if you're doing family meal times together, without the phone and without the screens, without the TV, where you actually have a conversation, um, [00:28:00] there's a, it's a massive impact on the divorce rate, which I thought was quite fascinating. Do you know what I mean? And that, that, um, that sort of being present in the moment at the dinner table, uh, Was, was quite an interesting thing for me.

So I'm like, okay, I shall take a note of that. That will go in my notebook and I shall remember this and I will not take the phone with me to the dinner table anymore. Um, so yeah, you, I mean, you mentioned that you're quite a driven person. Where did that come from? Is that from your active dad? Is that from somewhere else?

Is that something you just decided to be when you were 16 and read a book that changed your life?

Kelly: um i'm i don't know like so no it definitely wasn't something that um i was when i was younger um I definitely didn't have any intention of having my own business, um, I never would have said either that I was competitive at school, I was never great at sports, so I was never really competitive of that.

Um, I think it just came in [00:29:00] later life, I can't really pinpoint a moment or why, but, um... Yeah, just, just to definitely become more driven, um, as I've become older and then definitely more so since having the business and maybe, maybe it is something that's from my dad because definitely my dad, not my mum, would, was the competitive one.

So he used to run half marathons when he was younger and he was determined to beat 1 hour 30 on a half marathon and he did it in 1. 28 and he just. Yeah, he wasn't going to stop until he'd done his one hour thirty. So probably, yeah, from him. And my sister follows him in that respect, but she does it from a sporting point of view.

She also followed him with running, etc. like that. So I didn't do it from a sporting point of view, but from a, yeah, achieving in other ways, definitely as I've got older, become more driven.

Matt: yeah, and I would say that my wife became more driven. After we had kids, um, [00:30:00] and it's interesting how that has an impact, uh, on the family dynamic as well, isn't it? Um, and, and what that, what that drew out of her. So here you are in this sort of fast paced world of HR. I imagine, uh, Kelly, it's hyper competitive, the industry that you're in.

Um, you're working. The hours, you know, you're dealing with the passing of your dad, you're balancing family, marriage and business. What do you do personally to recharge your batteries?

Kelly: that sounds exhausting, just reeling all those things off. Um, so a couple of things, um, Peloton. I've got a Peloton. And so

Matt: a big

Kelly: I. Big fan of Peloton. I've never got into exercise. So as I said, my sister was one who was sporty, do running and all of that. And a few times she'd try to like, maybe run with her. And I'd always be like, be like one of these, like start and stop with a gym membership.

And then during lockdown, I got a Peloton. Um, Mainly because I think my sister is getting one. I was like, well, [00:31:00] if you could get one, I want one.

Matt: Ha ha ha ha ha.

Kelly: So, and honestly, I've had it now, like, yeah, since 2020. And it's the one thing I've consistently maintained. Not like every week, a day in day out. There will be times when I don't go on my Peloton It is something I really enjoy doing, so, and me and my sister set each other challenges to try and make herself go on it.

Um, so yeah, so I go by Peloton, but I like to exercise in the morning, I'm not an end of the day exerciser, I've got to get up and get it done. So Peloton is definitely something that I'll do. And then, um, The sun, like I, you know, I know, I know too much sun on your skin is not good for you, but I can't, you can't beat the feel of that, the sun on your skin and I love it.

Sitting outside in the sun is definitely something that will, you know, makes me relax and makes recharge. So yeah, those two things are my probably go to.

Matt: That's interesting. It's interesting you talk about the, I mean the Peloton I get because you know [00:32:00] it's, they, I've never done it actually. I'm, you know, I'm more of a, I have a gym at the house, I go down the gym and I'll lift weights, throw them around and I'll have a movie on or something in the background, or normally a podcast actually.

And, um, and it's, it's a great way to sort of spend 45 minutes. The Peloton thing I've not done. Um, but I can imagine actually the... The cleverness of that is you're doing a workout with a whole bunch of people on you, all the workouts are live, and you get involved, and um, you do it at home without having to leave your house and all that sort of thing.

Kelly: of those things. So I have my Peloton set up in my garage, which I can get to through the house, so I don't even have to leave the house. Great. Um, I literally just shut myself away in my headphones on. You can turn the music up as loud as you want. You can choose classes by either like a HIIT workout or low impact or a climb ride, or you could choose by music, by instructor, and then exactly that.

You've got somebody there who's like cheering you on. You've got other people in the class. So yeah, it is, for me, it's much better [00:33:00] than going to a gym or an exercise class at a gym.

Matt: hmm. Yeah. Yeah, that's interesting, isn't it? But then you talk about going out into the sun, which I have to be honest with you, no one has mentioned this. Now, have you come across Andrew Huberman?

Kelly: No.

Matt: Check out Huberman Labs, the podcast. Now, his podcasts, forewarning, are like two to three hours long.

Kelly: Oh, wow.

Matt: but they are riveting and one of the things that he mentions, um, cause he's, he's a neurosign, neuropsychologist I think, he's a neuroscientist, um, I think from Stanford, I mean he's a proper clever bloke, um, as we would say up north, he's a proper clever bloke.

And, um, he talks a lot about the brain and brain science and how, uh, one of the most important things that you can do first thing in the morning is go stand outside and look at the sky without sunglasses, actually, um, and get the sunlight on the back of your eyeballs, um, and how that makes a big difference to the [00:34:00] day, uh, which I think is really, really interesting.

You know, some of these sort of. Uh, I don't know if I'd call them old school, but some of these things that you think we've been doing for thousands of years, we wake up at dawn, we see the sunrise, but in the world in which we live, we keep the curtains shut until the alarm goes off. And then we don't go outside because, well, in England you don't want to go outside, it's wet. Um, but it's, it's one of those where he's like, you've got to get outside. It's not as good as if it's through the glass and get the sunlight on your face. And I think. That's very different to the world of you've got to have SPF and everything.

Kelly: Yeah. Now, obviously you've got to look after your skin and et cetera, et cetera. But there is definitely something about feeling like the warmth of the sun directly on your face. Love

Matt: very good. So, you're balancing life, you're on your Peloton, as you're on your Peloton with your headphones on, what does, what does the future look like? What's um, what's HR's, Star's sort of, what does more look like? What does growth look like for [00:35:00] you for the business?

Kelly: it. Okay. So, um, really lucky that the business is growing, um, through now just. I suppose I have a presence on LinkedIn through referral, etc. So for me, it's about growing in the right way. So, you know, some managed growth through working with the right kind of clients. So we tend now to do our best work and have most success with entrepreneurial led businesses.

Because they get it, like they understand their people are their biggest asset. They want to invest in their people. They've seen the change in expectation through the pandemic. And as we come out of it and how people, you know, want that hybrid working or more flexibility, and they're not seeing that as fluffy or just something to do to tick a box.

They're actually doing it and investing in it. So more of that, more of working with clients like that. I work now more on the strategic side. So providing that sort of HR director level advice and people strategy advice to clients. So to do more of that, I'd love that. And then we have the recruitment [00:36:00] side of the business.

So I never sat up to do recruitment, but. When we're working with clients and we're doing restructures and we're looking at, you know, creating job role profiles and culture pieces, et cetera, when they then have a need for new talent and, and it makes sense for us to help them find it. So that side of the business is really grown as well.

So it'd be good to do more of that. So yeah, just do more of what we do, um, with the right types of businesses. That's, that's what I.

Matt: I'm intrigued, um, Kelly, as you're talking, because obviously, I mean, I run my own business, you know, we have, uh, not a massive team, we have a small team, um, but a phenomenal team nonetheless. And I'm very aware that, um, you know, it's the team that makes the magic work, isn't it really? Uh, it's definitely not me.

It's definitely the team. are some of the things that are, that have come out of the pandemic that I, as a business leader, need to be aware of? So you mentioned hybrid working, you mentioned flexibility, which may be the obvious ones. What are some of the other things that we need to think about?[00:37:00]

Kelly: I think you need to think about, um, communication. Communication is something that always comes up over the years. I've worked in HR. When you speak to people within a business, they'll always moan about communication, but I think more so than ever, the expectation is there that people will have a voice within the organization that they work so that they get to have an input, a say into how things are done, um, you know, at least.

Asked how you know their thoughts and feelings on certain things that two way communication more so than ever adapting your processes and communication to this hybrid world of working so, you know, we're not having the In person necessarily chats are off the cuff chat so much now or be conducting more interviews online or, um, now working, having people, a remote team working in different parts of the world.

So thinking about how you're going to adapt your people processes to make that work. Um, again, it comes down a lot of it to [00:38:00] communication. Um, well being is something it is massive because, you know, people aren't, they're not going to be able to be at work or do their best work. So, um, Yeah, making sure that you've got provisions in place to, to support your people from a well being point of view.

And I think just asking your people, like, don't be afraid to ask your people what is it that you want from, from your, you know, from your time with, so, you know, what kind of benefits, if I could wave a magic wand, what would it look like, what, and then... See what you can or can't, you know, accommodate within that.

But I think it's also about transparency. So having transparent structures around salary, benefits, etc. So people understand what that looks like and how they can progress through it. Um, so I think it's just about all the stuff that we've talked about, and we do at HRSTAR and have done for a long time around looking at each of those areas of the employee life cycle, from how you're attracting to then onboarding, managing, [00:39:00] rewarding, developing people.

Being really clear on why and how you do that and sharing that with your people so that they have an understanding. One of the top, um, reasons people feel engaged is because they feel, when they feel part of the bigger picture, or they feel they have a say in, in, in, you know, the place that they work and they feel valued.

Well, being transparent about, you know, the employee experience and how you're going to manage that for them, and them through that, will definitely, you know, help you as a business owner attract and retain good people.

Matt: Mm. Very good. All very helpful. We have now got to the stage of the show, Kelly, where I am gonna, whoops, smack the microphone. I'm gonna bring up the question box. The bit that everybody gets nervous about, but you don't need to. So I'm gonna flick through, you're gonna say stop, and wherever we stop, that's the random question that we're gonna ask.

Kelly: Stop.

Matt: Okay. Oh, this might be an easier question [00:40:00] to answer than you anticipated. So, are there... Mistakes you repeat from one holiday to the next.

Kelly: Overpacking, always.

Matt: I was going to say exactly the same thing. over...

Kelly: You always think, right, I need this amount of outfits, this amount of underwear, this amount of this, and then you throw loads more in just for good measure, and then you get there and you're like, why did I bring all this stuff?

Matt: Ha, ha, ha, ha. Yep. I'm totally with you. So what do you typically overpack?

Kelly: Underwear. No

Matt: Okay.

Kelly: one does it. If you read like, um, just certain, um, you know, memes or, you know, holiday guides, et cetera, or back in the day when I used to read like goalie magazines and stuff, they always be like, why do, why are women always obsessed with bringing like double the amount of underwear that they need?

It's not like you go on holiday and you suddenly start like wetting yourself and it's like, it's true. Good point.

Matt: I guess? I don't know. Is it [00:41:00] the voice of your mum in the back of your head, you know, always telling you to make sure you've got clean underwear, and it's just like, I'm going somewhere new, I don't want to get caught short, I don't know. what drives it.

Kelly: Yeah, and a typical, you know, I'm one of those girls where I like have to bring loads of different bikinis, even though I've got my sort of go to bikinis that are really comfortable and I like. And every time you change a bikini, obviously it changes your tan lines, so you're better off just sticking with one bikini, to be honest.

Matt: You know what, uh, Kelly, you're just, I, I have to be honest, I've never thought about that my whole life. I feel like my eyes have been opened to a whole new level of pain. Um, but no, I'm, I'm with you. I've just literally got back from a three week trip to the States. Had a great time, um, uh, with the guys at Subsummit.

Chris George was on the podcast recently talking about it. Anyway, uh, I went to Texas, Oregon, California. Kansas and North Carolina. It was a heck of a trip, right? I don't think I stopped. [00:42:00] Um, but I, I, I definitely over packed and it's not like I've not done this before.

Kelly: Exactly!] I go on holiday all the time, and I try and go, wait, at least twice a year, and like, yeah, every time still overpack it.

Matt: Well, next time you do that on holiday, just remember this show and just remember to start laughing to yourself, just the way it is. And we're all going to do it this summer as well. You know we're going to do it, so, uh, Listen, Kelly, it's been a great conversation. How do people reach you? How do they connect with you?

If they want to find out more about you, maybe, or HR Star and how they can work with you guys, what's the best way to do that?

Kelly: So I'm on LinkedIn, so Kelly Tucker on LinkedIn. Um, or you can go via the website, which is hr uk or drop me an email, which is uk.

Matt: Fantastic, we will of course link to all of those things in the show notes as well. But Kelly, uh, uh, [00:43:00] genuinely really enjoyed the conversation. Thank you so much for coming on, telling us about your overpacking habits. Um, and giving us some excellent HR tips, uh, which is just fantastic. Genuinely really enjoyed it.

So thank you.

Kelly: me too. Thanks Matt. It's pleasure.

Matt: Wow. What a great conversation with Kelly. That was huge. Thanks again to Kelly for joining me today. And also a big shout out to today's show sponsor, Aurion Media. If you're wondering if podcasting is a good marketing strategy for your business, do connect with them at aurionmedia. com. That's A U R I O N media.

com. We will, of course, link to them on the podcast website as. Well, one more time, which is pushtobemore. com. Now, be sure to follow the Push To Be More podcast wherever you get your podcasts from, because we have yet more great conversations lined up, and I don't want you to miss any of them. And in case no one has told you yet today, you are Awesome.

Yes, you are. Created awesome. It's just a burden you [00:44:00] have to bear. Kelly has to bear it. I have to bear it. You've got to bear it as well. Now, Push To Be More is produced by Aurion Media. You can find our entire archive of episodes on your favorite podcast app. The team that makes this show possible is Sadaf Beynon, Estella Robin and Tanya Hutsuliak.

Select, uh, Theme Music was written by Josh Edmundson, and as I mentioned, if you would like to read the transcript or show notes, head over to the website, pushtobemore. com. That is it from me, that's it from Kelly, thank you so much for joining us, have a fantastic week, wherever you are in the world, I'll see you next time, bye for now.